This young fighter was battling it out last month during an exhibition match at the local Loy Katong festival.

"We are Thai"

I have long been a fan of Star Trek on television.  This American science fiction series classic has been cast several times over the span of some 30 odd years.   The incarnation, Star Trek The Next Generation, appeared in the late 80's.  This version of Star Trek featured a number of episodes with an alien group called the Borg.   Some of you may remember these episodes as they were incredibly popular.

The Borg were a collective of aliens who all thought with the same mind and acted in unison.  They never got into each other's way and they always seemed to be able to get things done efficiently.  Each Borg alien in the collective didn't recognized them self as an individual, each of them spoke of themselves as being part of the entire group.  When asked, "Who are you", they would always respond, "We are Borg".

I relate this to the Thais in a number of ways.   Certainly, Thai are not aliens.  And most certainly they do act with independence, but if you watch them work and visit together, you begin to sense their movements and actions have a lot of unity.  You'll notice that in many ways this group of people will act with one mind.   In reality, this kind of an illusion.  Their unity is a visual side effect of their customs.   I'm not saying they don't think alike because when it comes to their King they think exactly alike.   They all love and revere their King.

What I am saying is that their typical day to day unity stems from their the courtesy the extend to each other.  That is their protocol.  That is their upbringing.  That is their willful effort in giving themselves to a group effort.  Exchanging courtesy is their heritage and it's their pleasure.   I think this is the single greatest reason that Thailand is the land of smiles.

Their face of courtesy may not always be exactly how they are feeling.   You might call that hypocritical.   I disagree.  I look at their effort to put their best face foreword as a sign of respect.  I see that effort as their momentum in making a situation work well within the group (or between two people).

In an Asia culture, you give respect and earn respect when you yield to another person with an act of courtesy.   I view the Thais' exchange of courtesy as a moment where they offer up an effort to respect the other person.

Let's take a look at a few examples that might apply:

Example: Traffic

These two pictures were taken outside of the local night market within an hour of each other.  Thai traffic is quite a mixture of vehicles.   You have bicycles, motorcycle, cars, tuk-tuks, and people on foot.  Not everyone is in a the correct lane and sometimes they are running red lights and jay walking.   But, you'll not hear a word spoken between them.   In the west,  guys would be yelling at each other about how they had the right of way.  In Thailand, the rule of the road is merging.   Frequently, people gesture to each other to yield to the other as appropriate.   There may be an occasional toot on the horn if someone doesn't move on green but I don't see road rage.    People are extending efforts to yield.  Mass merging almost seems like a social event.  You can click on these photos for a closer look.

Example: A Phone Call

Thais have an interesting way to end a call.  One of the most common things that I hear in a frequent basis is a sequence of steps that sound like "Cop, Cop, Sawadee Cop".   Both parties will speak this to each other and typically the Cop, Cop will be interlocking between the two parties and the final salutation generally occurs at the same time.  It's not perfectly timed but there is mutual exchange of respect

When "We are Thai", you don't even think about it.  The first time you realize you've done it without consciously thinking about it, the hair on the back of your neck will stand up.  It will strike you strangely that you have just natively connected with another party in their language.    Incidentally, I have to laugh at myself sometimes.  I call back to my homeland in the US and I may speak with family or businesses there and I catch myself accidentally speaking small utterances Thai.

Example: Public Gatherings

When you move through a crowd, you sense some order.  You're feel a sense of speed.   Move too fast, and you'll disrupt the room.  If your body is "jerky", people will think there something wrong and notice you.  But, if you proceed through a crowd, bowing your head and Wai-ing at the correct times,  greeting people in the right way, you'll slip right through without standing out.

Let's say you have to pass in front of a small group of Thais watching a TV.   The correct gesture of courtesy is ducking low enough to not interfere with their view of the TV, but if you can't duck, low enough, you can pass with head bowed down just a little and you have communicated to them "sorry".  You might even silently mouth the word for sorry in Thai.  If you just happen to look to the side out of the corner of your eye as you pass the group, chances are very likely someone is looking directly at you and bowing back to you.  This is there acknowledgment and appreciation for your courtesy.

Reaching out to the other person with courtesy invokes a response from them in equal measure.  You'll feel a friendship with them even if you had never met them before.

Example: Funeral Precession

I have seen a few weddings and I have seen many more funerals.   I don't remember seeing any rehearsals.  I have not noticed any of these gathering being disorganized.  The appearance is that everyone knows what to do before they do it.   How does this happen?   Have they all be seeing these same routines all their lives?  I think part of the answer is, Yes, they have seen these events, but I also think Thai protocol makes these gathering very fluid and smooth and very respectful.  

Here you see a funeral procession.  I watched the people line up.   It seemed like they all knew their places before the march began.   You can click on these photos for a closer look.  I would like to bring you a full article about funerals in the future.  There seems to be a blending of traditions in funerals between Thai, Vietnamese and Chinese customs.

Example: Guy in Wheelchair

I wanted to mention an exchange that I have with a guy in a wheel chair.  It doesn't apply perfectly to my topic but it's a moment that I want to share with you.

I like to run.  I've been a runner for quite a long time.  It's what I like to do keep fit.   Frequently I'll run along the river here in Nakhon Phanom and on any given day there are people visit the waterfront during the day or night.   I on a sidewalk and about once or twice a week I see a guy there who is in a wheelchair.   He must be in his late 30's early 40's.  I have never met him formally.  I've never talked with him.  I don't know his story.  Based on what I see of his condition, my guess is that he has been in a wheelchair all his life.

This guy goes out of his way to give me an enthusiastic hello when I trot by him.  Typically this involves a wave of his hand and a word or two.  Usually it's a Sawadee, or a hello.  I return that gesture to him and I look right at him.  I let him know that I see him.  You would think we were friends to see this exchange.

My only conclusion is that he celebrates with me that I can still do what it is that I do.   My running is something that he can only dream about.   What would he give to have the use of his legs and run like the wind?   He would probably give everything he has.  Most certainly his debilitation has effected his work opportunities and his personal life, but I don't see him bitter and I don't see him angry.   He's is down at the river enjoying what life he does have and he shares that with me when I come by.  How could I not feel some connection to him?  How can I not feel to some degree, "We are Thai"

Example: Commerce

I took a girl out with one time and she saw a booth where you could get customized fingernail painting.  She asks if I would treat her to a set and I agreed.   She choose a nice purple pattern.   The artist made about 5 passes over those fingers to get all the colors and designs in the right place.   A clear coat was then applied to the nails for the final coat.  I paid, and my girl stood up to leave.   On the way up she accidentally brushed one of those finger nails against a nearby object.   Oops, half of that design on one nail was gone.   She felt bad for doing it, but with barely saying a word, she sad back down and the artist took out the supplies and began to rework that nail.   I immediately laid down additional moneys.

The unspoken willingness on both parties to go the extra distance to resolve a problem is part of I see as the Thai way.  In this case, virtually not a word was spoken and everyone ended up happy.   This is great part of "We are Thai".

"Resistance is Futile" (the closure)

Taking you back to the start of this opening article, let me add something about the fictitious Star Trek characters called the Borg.  They had a natural desire to "assimilate" you into their collective.  This was how they grew their population and strengthened their community.   When a new unwilling inductee was facing the induction processes, the Borg would customarily say, "Resistance is futile". 

The Thai are a little bit like that too.   They always seem to be very eager to introduce foreigners to single available Thais.  In most cases, a male foreigner to a single girl.  They want you to marry and be happy together.   They want to strengthen that family and the community.  Is resistance futile?  Not really.  You can walk away if you like, but quite a few male inductees have stayed.

I would be untruthful if I told you I didn't feel that enticement to be married to a Thai girl.   For me, the induction process goes kind of looses its luster when I see the next more beautiful Thai girl.   I think to myself "can't I just keep her for a while?"   Thai wives have a tendency to increase their leverages over a husband over time.  I don't if I'm up for that.  It's sometime to carefully consider before taking the plunge.

Virgin Article Update (from the naughty night life column)

I almost have to laugh at the all irate sex-pats who have expressed outrage and disgust at my article "Virgins the Holy Grail?".   You guys are squawking like a bunch of soccer moms in protest of Janet Jackson's nipple showing on television.  Gather around real close while I tell you the deep dark secrets about Thailand.  

A great many of the Thai guys seeking out nesting rights with the hot home town babe, are looking diligently for untouched bodies.   Many of these guys have have had their fun in their earlier years.   They have advanced in their families businesses, they are now in their mid 30's to early 40's.   Because they now run the business they have their hands on the family money.  They now have the resources to "buy into" the caliber of girl that they feel would be a proper mother.  What type of girl do they want?  You guessed it.

On the other side of the scale are the younger guys who may not have very much money.  What do think they do?  Believe it or not - a fair number of them get the younger girls pregnant and invite themselves into the girl's family.  I don't know if their efforts are conscience or subconscious or they are just plain careless of birth control.

There are of course marriages that seem to run a normal course.  But, quite a few on the upper end involve "value for money" (damn, there are those words again).  When guys are looking to plunk down some serious Sin Sot, they are expecting a girl with low mileage.

I personally don't set out looking for "Virgins" per se.   They can be a real pain in the ass when it comes to making plans to spend time together.  They are on shy side, they may be hiding their activities from the family, or just plain scared of the unknown.  Some of these girls do go home and tell their parents about me and in a few cases their parents "dangled their daughter like a carrot" and selectively limited my access to them.   It's true.  You may be baited by the family for a negotiated "buy in" to the family.

Over all, I would say about 20% of the girls that warm up to me here in the country are completely inexperienced.  You might even call them "Stem Cell" girls because there are fairly naive and ready to imprint themselves into a relationship for stability and advancement.  I get the impression they will fall in love out of choice and family obligation.

I won't tell you how I always handle these girls as each situation can be somewhat difference, but what I can tell you is that honesty remains the wisest position.

I did have a problem with a family that allowed me to be around one of their girls, a little bit a fun developed and then they tried to shake me down for cash.  A lot of money actually.  I'd like to tell that story to you someday -- if there are enough of you out in farang land who would appreciate it.   This type of situation will likely never happen in Pattaya, but if you're out in the country, you have to keep in mind that some families will go after you if you happen to be the recipient of their daughter affections.

Numbers for the week

I stopped paying for Google Ad space last Wednesday right before I released the "The Stickman Syndicate" article.  Google Adwords was bringing me about 100 to 150 possible new visitors each day.   With all the controversy in the search engines now, I don't think I need those ads  (should I be thanking Stickman and friends for their protracted I-net attacks?). 

OH, by the way people, The Great Galt is not allowed to post on 2 web sites now.   My comments and rhetorical questions are now just too thought provoking.  If you do see something that signed by me that doesn't look right -- you can be sure, I didn't write it.

But hey, this is a free world (mostly) and I don't let Stickman write any comments here on my site.   He has a whole web site at his disposal.   Some people hide on other sites cursing up a storm at the world, and other are in plain view taking ownership of their opinions.   I'd like to be known as the latter.

I have a treat coming for you.   I have asked one of my senor Thai guys here to make a report on the history and significance of the Fire Boat Festival (in Thai called Lai Reua Fai).  He will translate his account over to English and I will let you read about it from his perspective.   He remembers the Fire Boat Festival from a time when there was no electricity, no TV, and no telephones here in Issan.

Well, thanks for stopped by.  I sure with I had more time to write.  I really enjoy sharing my observations with you as a whole.  I hope that you have gained something useful in this article today.  BUT, don't trust me just because I say its true.   Check it out for yourself.   If you can get away from the tourist areas of Thailand and interact with the home town "Andy Griffith Show" type Thais, you'll see that not very much verbal communication is required and that most everything can be worked out with a little courtesy.  

John Galt